We got Beef!!

I’m packing, gathering up my things getting ready to head to the airport and I get a text from Big Sexy.

His Text: I’m bout to go eat at this spot

That is his way of asking me do I want to go eat with him.

My Text: I’m headed out of town for the weekend, won’t be back till Monday

His Text: Hmmm I don’t think I like that, where you going

My Text: Nashville

His Text: Who you goin to see

My Text: A friend of mines, were hangin out for the weekend

His Text: You goin out there to see some nigga, you gonna be havin sex with him

My Text: I do have sex sometimes

Me and Big Sexy don’t have sex

His Text: I don’t think I like that

My Text: Don’t be upset, you know I love you

His Text: We got beef

My Text: No we don’t have beef, I don;t have any beef and you can’t beef by yourself

His Text: Watch me, I’m petty like that

Now I did know he was upset and over the next week or so I attempted to reach out to him letting him know its all love on my end regardless, but he was holding true to his word and his beef so I left him alone. I got a text from him a couple of weeks later asking me to take him off my Daily Text message list. So I removed him and went on about my life. After about a month I get a text from him again saying something along the lines of I’m not right, I responded back to him: Still love you. A few days later another text comes from my friend saying: I used to love you. I responded back: Call me. A couple of minutes later the phone rings.

Him, smacking his lips “What”

Me “Big Sexy, really what is the problem”

Him “You are in the doghouse, what are you gonna do to get out”

Me, shaking my head and pursing my lips “No, I am not in the dog house…I don’t like to see you upset, however I didn’t do anything so there is no reason for me to be in the dog house”

Him “You know what you did”

Me “Remember what you asked me awhile back, remember when you asked me to never lie to you and I told you that you wouldn’t have to worry about that?”

Flashback to a few weeks before the Big Beef when me and Big Sexy are having a conversation about relationships and opening up to people. He is a very guarded individual, lets his guards down every once in awhile and is very weary of trusting people or letting them into his circle. Even when you are in his circle there is still a guard up most of the time. I remember him looking me in my eyes and asking me to promise to never lie to him. I told him that I would always tell him the truth. Back to current phone conversation.

Me speaking again after a moment of silence “You asked me a question and I told you the truth, you didn’t like the answer so you went on your solo beef journey, I understand if you don’t want to be my friend anymore or what not but you won’t get me to cop to being in the wrong in this case….soooooo do you want me to tell you the truth or not…do you want to be my friend or not, its up to you, but ‘Im not gonna play these head games with you, I’m cool on all that”

Now Big Sexy has women throwing themselves at him left and right, and I’m sure he’s used to them going over and beyond to appease his ego, to get him to stay interested in them or what not, however I’m not one of them. I truly care for him, I like being around him and hanging out with him, he is really fun when you catch him slippin without that wall up in front of him. If I wanted to go head to head, ego to ego with him, he would be “easy”, however these days when it comes to me and men, we either go heart to heart or we don’t go at all. That’s not because I will tell him to leave or he can’t be with me unless he is a certain way, its because if he doesn’t want to move past his ego then he most likely won’t like being in any type of relationship with me and will leave of his own accord. I didn’t know if he was going to come back or not, I wasn’t using any tactics on him, I didn’t try to get him to talk to me, I didn’t apologize to him for anything because I didn’t do anything wrong and, I let him know that I won’t be engaging in any unnecessary drama. I told him I personally like having him in my life and would like him to still be in it. If he is that upset and he doesn’t want to be in my life anymore I understand, I still love him, still want the best for him, still want him to be happy and blessed. No hard feelings. If he wants to continue the friendship then we can move on. No hard feelings either way, I have no need to make him feel bad because his ego was bruised. Gave his ego a kiss and let it know, I don’t take your actions personal.

Big Sexy “Maaannnn….yea I want you to tell me the truth”

Me “So we cool?”

Big Sexy “yea we cool”